Friends, enemies, frenimies,
Cyclocross is coming to Golden Gate Park on November 28th, 2010. Possibly for the last (sanctioned) time in the foreseeable future. What does this mean for you? Come enjoy the show:
If you know someone who’s racing, show up and cheer on your friends. They suck and/or are sandbaggers. Their race is probably kind of early, but that doesn’t mean you can’t drink and/or provide beer/bacon hand-ups. Furthermore, the dollar grab is a great way to incentivise Cat C racers to crash. Be a philanthropist. If they’re actually sucking it up and upgrading, they’re about to get demoralized. They will need a support network. Bring a shoulder for them to cry on, or if that doesn’t work out, the least you can do is talk some shit.
How can you prepare? Well, in the spirit of cyclocross, you’ll want to do some heckling intervals. Heckle as hard as you can for 30 seconds, rest for 30, repeat. You’ll feel exhausted, but your heckling will be top notch by race time. Suggestions: why are you running?, watch out for that tree (stand near a tree), there’s no smiling in cyclocross!, just shift into your granny gear, or my personal favorite – is that a touring bike? There’s lots of options. Be creative.
Cross is hard work and it’s really about pacing your effort. Grill, drink, heckle, and celebrate in moderation, but always save something for that last push to the finish. You won’t regret it.